[Swiftwater Gazette] Sunday football, Bill Belichick, the American Left

Ed kroposki kroposki at att.net
Sun Sep 17 07:17:06 EDT 2017

ImaginingBill Belichick analyzing film of the Left's strategyByLarry Alex Taunton February 02, 2017 
NewEngland Patriots head coach Bill Belichick was the man I’d beenlooking for. I needed keen insights, and only he could provide them.
Belichickwas famous for analyzing the game film of opposing teams, identifyingtheir strategies and beating them. His team, once again, was about toplay in the Super Bowl. My mission was delicate. Who else could Irely on?
SoI collected film of the American Cultural Left’s recent games onthe Washington Mall, on various news outlets, and in the halls ofgovernment, put them in an envelope and, in my imagination, I took itstraight to Belichick’s office in Foxboro, Mass. 
Atfirst Belichick complained of being busy, what with a Super Bowl andall. But seeing the obvious importance of this, he made time for me.With a cigar in one hand and a remote control in the other, he brokedown the film with his usual attention to detail. Although he washard to understand at times — he mumbles a lot — he missed nothing. The man is truly a genius.
CoachBelichick stamped out his cigar and turned on the lights. I was dizzyfrom this whirlwind of coach-speak, and he knew I might not remembereverything he had said, so he gave me one of those clever wristbandsthat quarterbacks wear so that they won’t forget the plays.
Deftlymaneuvering a laser pointer, he identified five primary strategies towhich the Left defaults in any game where playing by the rules isn’tenough to win:
1.Referees. When the other team scores a touchdown in a tight game,Belichick said, note that the Left wastes no time appealing to thereferees. Challenge flags are thrown, lawsuits are filed and, in TomBrady-like fashion, they take their deflated balls to federal court.Slowing down the game and gumming up the works is the point, ratherthan an excuse for more commercials.
2.Ideals. They find ways to (vaguely) identify their cause with theaverage fan. Do their ideals conform to the average American? Ofcourse, not. Americans want the sidelines clearly defined and guardedfrom fans illegally running onto the field; they want the refereesand the league to mostly stay out of their lives and out of theirpockets, and they want to play the game according to the rules. But,Belichick noticed, the Left often defeated teams that employed thisdefense by making them feel like this was somehow an un-American andbigoted way to play. Boundaries and first-down markers are movedmid-game, and by shifting the center of the game continually to theleft, they manage to convince many Americans that they are out ofstep with other teams in the league.
3.Obfuscate. That which is black and white, they make gray. What isclear, they make blurry. Rules are intentionally made ambiguous toensure that everything becomes a discretionary call by their selected review booth. Take marriage, for instance. We all thought we knew what that was. Man and woman. Flange A, Slot B. What could be moreobvious? But by the time they are through talking about it, they haveconvinced you that sex as you know it — as the whole of history hasknown it — isn’t natural at all! Indeed, they have convinced youthat defining words like “man” and “woman” is a very, verydifficult thing to do. It’s certainly not a job for ordinarypeople.
4.Tacitus. Was this a famous coach or quarterback from a previous era? No. It turns out that Coach Belichick is an educated man. He went on to explain that Tacitus, a Roman historian, had spoken of a principle called “divide and conquer.” The Left knows that evangelicals, 26percent of the U.S. population, pose the greatest threat to theirgame strategy. So the Left tries to run a spread offense, to getevangelicals running sideline-to-sideline. And getting evangelicalsoff their assignments is easy. Relying on misdirection, the Leftsimply finds a verse in the Bible that appears to support its agenda.Failing that, it finds a Christian — or someone who at least sayshe’s one — and quotes him liberally against other Christians.
5.Scream. This, Belichick declared, is the Hail Mary. They use thisplay, he insisted, when all else fails. This chiefly means they stormthe field and pull down the goal posts — but for precisely theopposite reason that this is usually done — that is, after winninga big game. This, the coach said, was the play they ran on theWashington Mall. Ashley Judd and Madonna were the halftime show. (Onthis point, he did not seem impressed.) The idea, it seems, is tobully, ridicule, demonize and isolate anyone who is in opposition.This is where fans are useful. They are encouraged to boo the opposition loudly on social media.
CoachBelichick stamped out his cigar and turned on the lights. I was dizzyfrom this whirlwind of coach-speak, and he knew I might not remember everything he had said, so he gave me one of those clever wristbandsthat quarterbacks wear so that they won’t forget the plays.
Onit he had inscribed:
“It’san acronym,” he said. “It’ll help you remember.” Noting myconfusion, he added: “It’s Patriots — without the P-A-T, ofcourse.”
Itested my memory on the meaning of each letter: Referees, Ideals, Obfuscate, Tacitus, Scream.
“Gotit, coach.”
Ourmeeting now over, I left a sadder and a wiser man.

LarryAlex Taunton 

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